


99.9% matched (0.01% more if you hold my hand.)

by yanvels



Category: NCT (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Angst with a Happy Ending, Class Differences, First Kiss, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Homophobia, M/M, Soulmates, Strangers to Lovers, Swearing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-27
Updated: 2019-10-26
Packaged: 2020-10-29 13:02:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 19,532
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20797049
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/yanvels/pseuds/yanvels
Summary: in a world where you could take a dna test to see who is your perfect match, jisung's family receives a call from one of the most influental families in china.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> so to add on to my works that were created due to insomnia, we got this, hehe.  
this work had been sitting around in my wip's from a while since i wrote that prompt on twitter, and i decided to finally just put it into parts to make it easier. this is a chenji soulmate au where ppl could get a dna test to find their ideal s/o, and i just thought it'll be interesting so kljflkf well my-whipped-for-chenji ass aside, i hope you will enjoy the story!

Jisung liked to think. It seems like a vague, meaningless thing to say, but he truly did. He liked to imagine about how life would go as he walked, to make up scenarios that people would deem impossible. He liked thinking about bad things ahead of time, so it wouldn’t hurt as much when it finally arrived. He liked to be ahead - one step ahead of his looming future that he couldn’t predict.

He liked all of that, but even he had some limits to how delusional he can be. There was no reason for Jeno to release his angry cats at him, or have Nana throw on him food he just cooked up. His friends from the dance studio wouldn’t take away from him a well deserved solo, and he knew that whatever he thought of, will remain within his mind, in the realm of impossible.

Which is why when life came crashing down on him, and impossible became possible, he felt like the world is ending. No matter what he’d think of, he’d never be able to just assume what just happened would be a real, possible scenario.

It was Sunday morning, the birds chirping and dancing around on his window sill. Those pigeons were always overtly loud, waking Jisung as if it was a school day and they were his alarm. If he had the power to actually rise from his bed, maybe he would bother shoo them away, but at this point in his life, he knew it didn’t matter. Those pigeons thought he was a joke, and would return a minute after he returned to bed. He gave up on scaring them long ago.

On any other Sunday, he would have probably just shut them out with some pillows on his ears, but today was a bit different. He could hear his parents having a rather heated discussion downstairs, and considering he gets all of his lazy genes from his dad, there is literally no reason for him to yell at seven in the morning. It struck Jisung as oddly suspicious, that he isn’t backing off this time.

So Jisung thought to himself, after he figured out returning to sleep would not be an option due to the ruckus downstairs. He came up with a game plan, one that he considered exceptionally brilliant.  _ Go down, come up to them tiredly. Tell them you woke up because of the yells… Mom would totally make bacon out of guilt.  _ He smiled to himself. He was sixteen years old, but he was his parents only child. They liked to spoil when they could, and he wouldn’t say no to that.

He lifted himself off his bed, looking at the long mirror he had near his wardrobe. His striped, blue and white pyjamas along with the messy hair would be enough of an incentive for his parents to believe him. He grinned at his reflection and got out of his room, slow and slouching. He felt like he should be quiet, let his appearance be a surprise, so he walked down the stairs slowly as his parents’ words grew more and more coherent to his ears.

“But… If it’s real, do you know what it means? He will be set for life, Inseong! They .… family, one of those you actually hear about in the news! ….wouldn’t have to worry about anything… Inseong, we don’t even have money to send him to college.” His mother said- actually, no, it sounded like she cried it out. Jisung halted in his place, a blind spot between the upper floor and the entrance floor. He had  _ never  _ heard his mother cry. When he was younger, he mother worked in three different jobs and called it easy. She was not that emotional, ever. He tried to listen more attentively, sneaking a bit closer. 

“If it’s not real, he would be absolutely miserable. These DNA tests are new, nobody knows if they are legitimate! Their son is seventeen, why would they bother marrying him so early? He’s our only son, Shiyeon!” His father argued, the skeptical undertones showing clearly in his voice. 

Jisung’s felt his stomach lurching.  _ Marrying? Only son? This has to be a joke, right?  _ There was no way something this ridiculous was actually happening, they had to be pranking him. His father pranked him before, telling him they were going to Lotte World on the day he faked being sick years ago, or saying he’ll buy him Nintendo Switch if he does his chores for him. It has to be one of those things, right? He was always lazy on Sundays, they must have decided to team tag on him.  _ Right? _

He slowly went down the stairs, knowing that his mother and father wouldn’t keep up the act if he just stopped eavesdropping.  _ They probably already know I’m here,  _ he thought to himself and pouted. He felt a bit more confident at that thought. Of course it’s a prank, he wasn’t a dumbass. They are acting way too dramatic for it to be real.

“Good morning!” Jisung said brightly when he finally reached the bottom of the stairs, both of his parents snapping their heads towards him. His mother immediately wiped her eyes, looking away from her son before plastering a smile back on her face. 

"Ah, Jisung!" She squeaked, her usual cheery demeanor taking over once again. She fumbled with some dishes, going to the fridge. "Let me get you breakfast…" She said, avoiding his eyes. 

His father gave him one glance and stalked away to the living room, mumbling about some newspaper he needs to find.

Jisung liked to think, but at moments like these, he wished he could turn his mind off.

-

It has been a lovely spring day when his family announced that they would be having guests over. Their humble abode was a run down house, with peeling walls and shaken up foundation, but Jisung's mother did her best to make sure the the place looked spotless. 

Jisung thought it was useless, with the ugly brown spots you could see all across their home, but his mother called it 'dalmatian aesthetic' and at that point he figured that there's no point arguing.  _ Maybe I'll be better off just sticking to my room today. _

His mom told him that some people are going to come over to 'discuss' something, and he just generally assumed that it was one of his father's colleague's again, who came over once in a while to speak about future goals for work and such. It never interested him, and ever since Jisung fell asleep and drooled on the table, he was never forced to be in these meetings anyway. 

_ But that would be too boring, to just stay the entire day in my room…  _

Thinking it over, maybe he should just go bug Jaemin. He could probably even get him to cook something for him. 

Jisung came up to the entrance, dressed in the same stressed ripped jeans and dark green hoodie that he had on for the entire day. "Mom, I'm going to over to Jaemin's place!" He shouted from his place, already on his way to slip on his shoes. At that moment, he could swear he could hear a wolf running up to him. 

"Park Jisung! I told you there guests today because I need you here for the discussion. It's really important and you need to be a part of it." She said sternly, stopping him in his tracks. Jisung stared at her up and done, trying to figure if she was serious. 

"Since when do you need me for meetings? Mom, what's going on? You are acting weird…” He accused, but he really couldn’t help it. This had been going on for the last few weeks, where his mother would cling to him more than she ever did, tell him he can’t go to his friends who he used to visit every day, and now they need him for the dumb meetings?

His mother’s expression softened a little, but not in a way that he would’ve liked. She seemed guilty and almost wishful, running her hand through his hair and setting her arm against his cheek, rubbing it gently. Jisung almost jolted back. This person did not feel like his mother. She seemed like a new person entirely.

“Jisung, I… I thought it might be better to let you just see, but…” She sighed out, trying to figure out which words she wanted to use. “Do you know about this thing in the recent news, you know, those DNA matches?” She asked, petting his head.

“...The soulmate thing? Yeah, I saw it on the news with you… we laughed about it…” He answered uncomfortably, moving his face away from her hand. It didn’t feel comforting, and with the topic was revealed, Jisung was more uncomfortable. He didn’t want her to console him, if there was anything that made her need to do that.

“Jisungie… a family called. They tested their son, and the answer was you.” She almost whispered. Jisung’s heart sank, and that morning from a few weeks ago replayed in his mind. He felt like he was hit by a truck, and the frozen state that he got into seemed to have worried his mother, who held both of his hands, squeezing them while looking at him in concern.

“T-that test is so expensive, nobody can afford to have it, mom, this has to be a mistake…” He started stuttering to her, his hands in front of his defensively, open wide and moving from side to side in disbelief. Nobody is able to get that damn test, it has to be a lie, Jisung couldn’t think about any other explanation. It  _ had  _ to be wrong!

“Sungie… They are a chaebol family from China. Their net worth is almost as high as Samsung group’s one. They tested their kid three times, just to make sure it was not a mistake. Genetically speaking, you are supposed to be his highest percentage match.” She told him, and his hands covered his ear at the speed of light, pulling away from his mother’s  _ attempted _ reassuring squeezes.

“You are marrying me off.” He stared at her, the anxiety taking over his mind. He couldn’t go marrying some guy he never known! He couldn’t, what about his friends here? His dance studio? What about him, who actually wanted to find someone he liked?  _ I can’t, no, this is… _

“Absolutely not, Park Jisung!” His mother yelled at him, finally reminiscent of who she actually was his entire life - the stubborn, determined figure that would rather break than bend. Jisung looked at her, a glimmer of hope enclosed within his wistful expression. His mother pursued her lips before sighing once again.

“I’m going to be honest with you, Sungie. We’re not marrying you off, not straight away. But this is an opportunity that you are more than likely never going to get. Me and your dad can’t pay for you to go to college, can’t pay for a better house, we can’t help you progress in life, because we can barely pay our own rent. They, however, can give that for you, and if the test has any merit at all, you’ll be  _ happy _ with their kid.” She empashished on the word. Jisung didn’t know if he was ready to start feeling hopeful - all of this mess just seemed world shattering.

“What am I supposed to do then?” He asked, his usually deep voice sounding all of the sudden much smaller and softer.

“Give it a chance. Don’t say no straight away. Just…. think about it. If this is truly your soulmate, there is more to look forward to than to be scared of.”

Somehow, Jisung doubted that.

-

Evening arrived faster than he’d like to. Jisung refused to change out of his hoodie and jeans, or to put a shred of effort in his appearance. He might have been shocked when his mother first told him, but now he’s just plain upset. Why should he give up his life to be married off to some stranger in another country? His mom won’t admit it, but she expects him to go along with it. He isn’t going to ditch his life here just because some DNA test told him he should.

He couldn’t imagine going along with it. In fact, he was so against it, that when he heard cars pulling by their house, that he immediately felt like he had to get away. As fast as possible. And he did. He was lucky that his house was a prime example to bad architecture and the easiest house in the neighbourhood to rob, because with some  _ amazing  _ windows placements, you could literally climb in and out of his room with ease. 

From there he only had to go through their already broken fence, and he was on the street. No biggie. He was already used to this entire route, he used to do it a lot back when Jeno was still living a few blocks away. Jisung didn’t really know where he should go, but he figured that maybe getting to his favorite coffee place, Sunsaid cafe. The place had a calming effect on him, but maybe it was because the clerk that worked the cash register was probably one of the funniest people Jisung knew. Even though he kind of just wanted to disappear, his only good option was going to the cafe. 

He went down the street, brushing his hair back with his fingers to make sure  _ he didn’t  _ look like he escaped his own home. He was grateful for the spring breeze that hit his face, because he was more than ready to find air conditioning at the moment. Today was disgustingly hot for a spring day, and even though his hoodie was thin, he could feel the sweat forming on his forehead. 

Jisung rushed into the cafe when he finally saw it in the horizon. The yellowish, lacquered wood of the place popped out like a shining star. It was wasn’t a great feat, considering the shop was placed in the middle of two ugly, greyish shops that looked more like storage units than actual stores, but Jisung still admired the place for its boldness in a rather monochrome neighbourhood.

He entered the cafe hastily, quickly finding his place on one of the bar chairs near the register. He smiled at the sight of his friend working it.  _ Never had I been happier to see you and your frizzy curly hair, Lee Donghyuck.  _ He went straight up to him, taking his seat and melting onto the counter dramatically. Donghyuck stared at him for a moment before rolling his eyes.

“I’m not giving you a free Frappuccino, if that’s what you are here for.” Donghyuck told him flatly, his eyes squinting in half suspicion and half curiousness. Jisung furrowed his eyebrows, giving him a glare before mimicking the other’s exact words in a mocking tone. Donghyuck looked to the side and snorted at the pathetic display.

“Hyung, don’t laugh at me, I’ve had a really shitty day.” He whined at him. Jisung was well aware that by now he probably looked more reminiscent of a kicked puppy than anything else, but he sort of felt like one, so it was only fitting. He sunk his head between his hands trying to think of something else.

“Fine, but stop sulking. You look like you’re about to cry and I’m not going to mop here in the middle of my shift.” Donghyuck said, patting Jisung’s head lightly. “Do you want to tell me what happened?” He asked him, and Jisung lifted his head a little to look at him back. He didn’t even want to think about it, or else his brain might just start erupting needless thoughts. He came over here to escape that reality anyway.

“Parents.” He compromised, deciding that even though it’s not even close enough to the truth to be a white lie, it was still a substantial part of the problem. Donghyuck hummed at him, nodding his head before giving Jisung one last pat.

“Jaemin is a problem, you’re right.” He grinned at him, and it was Jisung’s turn to snort. Maybe it wasn’t the answer he needed to fix things, but it was an answer he was more than happy to hear. It was just so  _ Donghyuck  _ that it gave Jisung a sense of normalcy in a day that everything went upside down.

There was a sound from behind him, and Jisung only realized it was a customer walking in when Donghyuck plastered his ‘friendly cashier’ smile at him, pearly white teeth showing generously. Jisung could see past that smile, recognize the way Donghyuck strained his face until laugh lines appeared. It was comically fake, but most people didn’t see through it, and if Donghyuck gets a tip out of that, he couldn’t really blame him for doing that.

The customer came closer, looking around in a way that almost seemed confused. Jisung took a better look at him. He had a strong jaw that contrasted with his button nose, alongside brown chocolate hair that seemed to have been dyed, not only from the color, but also from the damage it seemed to have been put through. He looked around Jisung’s age, maybe younger, but maybe that was just because his cheeks looked squishy.

“Um.. Iced coffee?” He said in english, his hands moving with him as he tried to communicate with Donghyuck, who quickly adjusted himself as he realized he was dealing with a foreigner.

“Small, medium, or large?” Donghyuck asked in english as well, showing him the sizes they have at the display near the register, as calm as ever. 

The guy looked pretty embarrassed and overall uncomfortable, but brightened up slightly with Donghyuck’s answer. He pointed at the large cup, smiling. Donghyuck gave him a nod and straight away took a large cup to his hands. “Any other requests?” He added for good measure. 

“No, thank you.” He said, shaking his head lightly. Jisung had to note that his voice was actually rather sharp and loud, not in an unpleasant way, but one where Jisung felt like even if he sat in the other part of the cafe he would still be drawn to it. Donghyuck left for a second, to work out the iced coffee machine, and they were left near the register alone.

Jisung was staring at him, even with his head still leaning on his arms that were sprawled on the counter. He didn’t even realize until the other looked back at him, his brown eyes looking at him up and down, questioning. It was only then that he had gotten self-aware as his cheeks reddened.  _ I’ve been sulking on the counter for twenty minutes, fuck! Shit, he has to think I’m a creep… _

They kept eye contact for a few more awkward moments before the other decided to speak up.

“...Are you okay?” He asked, looking almost concerned.  _ Maybe concerned for my sanity,  _ Jisung thought to himself. Jisung stared at him blankly for a few seconds he even registered he had to answer, trying to looking for any words in his mind to answer him with, his face panicking with him as he does. He had always been the type on person who just understood and couldn’t really answer back in english. He gave up after a few stressful seconds.

“Okay.” He copied, covering his face with his hands out of embarrassment. He really should’ve taken up those private english lessons with Jaemin back when he could.  _ Not only I look like a shameless creep, now I’m also a dumbass. This day is going great.  _

The stranger grinned behind his fisted hand, and his smile stretched all across his face. Unlike Donghyuck’s, it seemed genuine. “Okay.” The stranger answered with some kind of a carefree smile, his eyes crinkling up. It didn’t sound or looked like he was mocking him, so Jisung let himself relax a little, even if he was still embarrassed. 

Donghyuck came back, iced coffee in hand. “There you go. 3500 won, please.” Donghyuck asked, and the other nodded, pulling out his wallet and giving the other a 5000 won bill, and waving Donghyuck away when he tried to give him the change back.  _ So I guess that customer service smile does work. _

“Oh! Also, what is your name?” Donghyuck suddenly asked, making Jisung give him a look. Why did he ask for a name? This is not Starbucks, why would he do that? In this sort of shady neighbourhood, asking extra questions would make people look suspicious.

Donghyuck didn’t even bother sparing a glance at Jisung.

The foreigner looked confused, but complied anyway. “Zhong Chenle.” He answered, the Chinese accent kicking in fully. How is Donghyuck even supposed to spell that? He had no idea how to write that in English. He isn’t even completely sure he will get it right in Korean. It was a pretty name and all, but…

“Cool.” Donghyuck said straightforwardly, just giving the now very confused Chenle the cup. “This guy is Jisung, in case you wondered. If you need anything let me know.” He pointed at Jisung as he introduced him, leaving them alone once more as he went to to the kitchen. Jisung’s mouth fell agape and his cheeks flamed up.  _ He did not just do that. What the fuck?  _ He’s going to kill Donghyuck later.

“Jisung?” Chenle asked incredulously. Jisung nodded shyly, sort of wishing the ground would swallow him whole right at this moment. Chenle stared at him, but at the same time he looked zoned out, in his own world. He looked down for a second, Jisung could see him smiling. 

“Okay.” He muttered softly, lifting his head again after he took control of his expression. 

Jisung felt kind of approved. He didn’t know why, but regardless, he felt the tips of his ears turn red.

He felt his phone vibrating in his pocket, but he was too flustered to actually care. Even though neither of them really knew what to say, for both the facts that one, the language barrier was being incredibly inconvenient and two, that the situation was also a tad bit awkward.

Regardless, they managed to have some sort of conversation, through simple words and hand movements, and it was a fine distraction for Jisung to ignore his day. They bonded over a shared love for the peanut butter and chocolate cake that was displayed in the shop, with Chenle pointing at it, excitedly saying  _ ‘my favorite cake’  _ and Jisung very much approving of his good taste.

They both ended up ordering a piece, gladly munching on their cakes with a feel good, comfortable silence for a change. Jisung will admit that even though he was embarrassed over what Donghyuck did, whatever this was  _ was _ rather comforting.

It was also rather funny to see Chenle jumping from his seat. His phone buzzed too loud, and he laughed nervously at his response to it, looking at Jisung shyly and scratching his head. He got his phone out of his pocket to read some message right afterwards.

Whatever it was, it didn’t seem to make Chenle very happy. 

He came up from his seat quickly, giving Jisung an apologetic frown. “I need to go…” He mumbled quietly, his eyes averting from Jisung’s gaze.

Jisung couldn’t lie, he felt a twinge of disappointment at those words, but all good things, and especially all good distractions had to end at some point. He exhaled almost too loudly, something he tried to completely ignore he did, before garnering the most eloquent english he could garner at the moment.

“It was nice meeting you… see you again?” He asked, mostly because he couldn’t think of another thing to end the sentence with. He didn’t really want to say a plain bye, it felt too dishonest and distanced. There was however, a tiny part of him that felt like he wouldn’t mind seeing the boy again, if he could. 

_ But what are the chances he will meet this foreigner again, in this gigantic world? _

His thoughts were broken by Chenle’s tiny, but honest smile, along with his words that soon followed.

“See you again.” He repeated affirmatively.

  
Jisung could not lie. He had some hope that they’ll meet again.  _ _


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> YAY chapter two is up : DDDDD im so happy i finally got to write it.... it's almost 8k so i hope this will make up it took me some time. but anyway enjoy!!

He felt like he’d meet him again, but he didn’t expect it to be that soon.

Neither did he expect meeting him in these circumstances.

Not long after Chenle had left, his father found him in the shop with Donghyuck. He knew for a fact that if he had been in a more private place, he would have scolded with booming, harsh shouts and yells, but because Donghyuck looked at him with his rather innocent deer eyed look, he had to go softer. Regardless, Jisung was dragged back into his house, learning that his parents are only letting this slide because apparently, his “soulmate” did the same. 

What he expected to see when he arrived home was some snarky, arrogant kid who probably thought their house was trash while thinking he had to marry some street rat. Jisung had his fair share of people looking down on him for his financial status, and enough people thought he was a charity case knowing that he pretty much tried out for any scholarship he could get. Jisung could only imagine this so called rich kid is probably hurling at the thought of meeting someone like him and having to call him his soulmate.

_ Gosh, now people are going to say I have a sponsor…  _ He wanted to hurl himself now. But his father was dragging him by the wrist to the house, and he already understood he wasn't getting out of this meeting no matter how much he wished he could.

The door to their shabby home opened in a haste from his father's side, revealing their squeaky clean living room that looked much too sparkly to be familiar. Within the house, stood his angry mother, one hand at her waist, enveloping it, and another at her mouth, nibbling on her self-manicured nails in stress.

Not far away from her stood a rather short couple, Jisung would easily tower either of them if he stood next to them. They were dressed richly, the man in a smooth looking suit while the woman wore a combo of lilac shirt and pencil skirt, with jewellery such brooches and bracelets that his mother could probably never afford.

Jisung scanned the room with his eyes, looking for who will be his soulmate, looking for the judging, or even worse, disgusted eyes to take him in. 

He found no such thing from another person, but for a few moments he couldn't help but judge himself as a bile formed in his throat.

Zhong Chenle stood in front of him, his brownish eyes half glancing, half avoiding as he scratched the back of his head. The same cute boy he had met only an hour before. Jisung couldn’t explain the feeling that crawled down his spine. The same boy he felt escape with is the one that is going to be his trapper.

Somehow, it made Chenle feel less trustworthy. The way he reacted to his name now seemed more understandable, but the way he failed to mention his relation to Jisung made Jisung feel insecure. Like he hid it away from him to test the waters, to decide if he wanted to sail his boat or not, as if Jisung was a variable that could be replaced.

He hated it. 

Jisung, for all his overthinking, would’ve never imagined a scenario like this happening to him. The bitterness that spread in his mouth overshadowed his mother’s angry screams, or the disapproving faces of both those he assumed were Chenle’s parents to both him and their son. He never was a person to hid his reactions, but right now, he couldn’t help but hold back on tears.

“Park Jisung, are you listening to me? You are going to apologize to the Zhongs right now, they made time particularly just to meet you! I did not raise you to be this shameless!” His mother yelled, but it fell on deaf ears that turned red as he grew more infuriated, more hurt and annoyed. He wanted to leave so badly. He just wanted to go, his mind told him, repeating in a mantra, aching to escape this situation. 

But at the same time, he also wanted to stay. At home, safe. In the place he knows, in a place not foreign or forced upon him. He wanted to shout, but he also wanted to curl in his mother’s arms. He didn’t want to go. He couldn’t.

“I don’t want to.” He said quietly, a whisper barely told with a strained, broken voice. His father’s hand, still holding him as if it was a handcuff, loosened at his weak words, and even his mother found it in herself to look at her teary son with some worry in her own eyes. 

“Jisung, whatever you stand on this, you need to apologize. Their son already apologized to us, don’t be prideful..” She lowered her voice, now trying to reason with him instead. Her lips were stuck in a firm, uncomfortable line, trying not to glance at the two chaebols behind her. Jisung felt his insides burn up.  _ He already apologized…  _ If he was truly his soulmate, wouldn’t he had stayed with him and taken the blame alongside him? It felt like he was making Jisung seem bad, and Chenle looking so uncomfortable, along with avoiding Jisung’s eyes at all costs made him think he didn’t care at all.

Was he just an _ okay?  _ Is that all he’d ever be? And even if he was, was it not  _ enough? _

A tear slid off onto Jisung’s cheek, and he was shaking. He can’t understand why does everything hit him so hard right now, but breathing seemed like enough of a task right now, when he couldn’t even manage to feel the air as he inhaled. He was no good at multitasking, him being a klutz in every sense of the word even when he focuses on one thing, but even functioning was hard at that very moment.

“I think we will leave for tonight.” Chenle’s father spoke, offbeat, accented Korean leaving his mouth. There was a finality to his words that made it very clear that it was not only a thought, but practically a command. Jisung looked up as more tears fell down, his father’s hand now finding its way to his own palm, holding and giving some reassuring squeezes. Jisung was still sniffling harshly, but the warmth gave him hope, along with the apathetic face Chenle’s father had on.

Chenle then seemed to pipe in, saying something in Chinese. Jisung couldn’t understand, but there was a quarrel between the two, and Chenle’s voice rose two octaves as he argued, his hands clenched in fists. He could imagine that he said something among the lines of  _ tell them it’s off already, that nothing will happen.  _ Jisung hoped for that as well, but he can’t say the thought didn’t sting. 

His father ended it with one vile commanding tone, and Chenle refused to look at him, but his mother took him by the elbow, encouraging him to walk with her. “Have a good evening.” Chenle’s father said begrudgingly, not even looking twice at Jisung or his parents. Chenle’s mother was a tad bit more polite, bowing slightly as she said her goodbyes with a trained smile on her face the seemed far too happy for the situation. While his parents returned the bow and the so called ‘pleasantries’, Jisung had his eyes set on one person.

Chenle, despite the entire situation that just unfolded, simply stared at Jisung as his mother locked both of her hands on his arms. He was being dragged away but all he could manage to do was act like a shocked goldfish with little to no regard of how Jisung was feeling. Jisung’s heart pounded uncomfortably in his chest, and he was unable to ignore it.

He didn’t know what hurt more, to know he embarrassed himself in front of that boy that was supposed to be his soulmate in such an irreversible way or the look of pity that graced Chenle’s face as he left. When the doors slammed behind him and his parents, he let himself go and just cry. 

He could feel his father enveloping him in a hug, and hear his mother repeating apologies that in the grand total of things, mattered none. Today he had felt more low and dirty than ever, as if he was a chewing gum stuck to the streetside, waiting for people to step upon. He would never be able to forget this embarrassment.

What was even worse, was that even with all of this happening, somewhere in his heart he wished that the pity on Chenle’s face could’ve been concern.

-

It had been several days since the disastrous day and Jisung just started to feel like everything was okay again.

The first day after he could barely leave his bed, and he found himself ghosting Jaemin and Donghyuck alike to the point of them calling so many times his mother actually forced him to answer. He missed two days of school, so he probably would’ve had to answer at some point to get the notes he needed from class, but he guessed it’s good he finished with it earlier than expected. Less burdens for later, he figured.

There was a soft knock on his door. Jisung gave out the most incoherent sound he could produce, but he had no doubt it was his mother behind his door, and his mother understands his language, even if she never signed up to learn it. She opened the door carefully, and that already made Jisung a bit uncomfortable, but he could already tell something was on when she hid one of her hands behind her back.

“Sungie…” She started. He immediately glared. His mother did not call him Sungie, not for no reason. She was the one who gave him his name and was as proud of it as could be. She wouldn’t name him after her favorite soccer player to just shorten his name all of the time. 

He eyed her suspiciously. “What is it?” 

“Listen, I know you had a hard time with the whole soulmate thing, and I know that you think they all hate you, but, someone came to our door today, and I thought you should know about this.” His mother said softly, revealing a white letter in her hands.

Jisung, first of all, wanted to throw the letters the farthest he could. He didn’t have a choice but to meet his so called soulmate, but he does have a choice to decide whether or not he wants to associate himself with this now. He stared at the white envelope with anger, squinting at the fancy red stamp that sealed it shut and how official and distanced it looked.

“So his parents wrote me some formal letter, big deal. Please tell me why should I care.” He said sarcastically, his hands remain unmoving, sitting on his chest folded. 

"No, sweetie, the kid wrote it. Your soulmate." His mother corrected, and his heart pounded a beat that was felt all throughout his body before it sank, both anxiety and doubt rising.

"I.. I can't read Chinese anyway… what's the point…" Jisung said, looking away from her. His fingers itched a little bit, egging him on to take it, to just look, but his wounded pride of being both left in the dark and being dismissed by both Chenle and his parents also ached and told him to not give in.

"Look at the envelope more closely, dear." She told him, convincing him with her gaze instead of her words. His hesitant hand took the letter within his hands, and it looked so much smaller within them, some worry within him growing that one wrong move and he'd rip it and ruin it.

On the back of the envelope, penned unskillfully and should he be honest in relative ugliness, _for_ _park jisung, my soulmate. _

It had spelling mistakes, and maybe he wouldn't have been able to read it if he didn't have years of practice in reading Jaemin's rushed study notes he always gave him before exams, but something within him swelled, for the first time in a long time, he was acknowledged.

There's a sense of satisfaction that he felt fulfilled within him, that was devoid from him before. He liked to think about achieving things, getting into amazing places, being loved and the likes, but he had never believed he would ever be able to reach such things. He kinda grew to believe that some dreams are meant to stay dreams, after so many scholarships turned him down, and every single solo he ever could've gotten in the dance studio was given to another. 

Having something like this happening to him seemed too good to be true, and he didn't like risks. He didn't know what it's like to be the center of a story or how it was like being paid attention to, at least not anything positive. The closest thing he had to compare were his shabby birthdays, where Jaemin, Jeno and Donghyuck made him half burnt cakes that were so because of Jeno's ineptness with all kitchen tools. 

But his friends were not in his own grade, nor will he have them with him next year, and he already accepted that most of his future days will be rather lonely aside from the dance studio sessions, that will also come to quite a halt considering half of the students are going to leave for university, and the older guys are slowly getting jobs and building their own careers.

"...Can I read it on my own?" he asked his mother, and his mother's face scrunched up playfully, messing up his hair as she nodded. 

"Sure, sure, I won't read your love letter. Come to me later though, if it changed your mind, there's other things to talk about." She said, moving out from the room lightly on her feet, just before Jisung could respond to her comment in any other way except reddening. 

A bit frustrated and a bit excited at the same time, he bit his lips as he tried opening the letter without ruining the envelope, digging at its pointy edge, the adhesive slowly relenting under his force.

_ to jisung! _

_ i am sory abot what happend that night. i'm sory if i did someting wrong, i didnt want to see you cry. i liked talking to you in the shop i was hapy. i hope i can see you again. i cant rite a lot but i realy liked you so i trid.  _

_ ps. sory abot the bad korean. my frind helped me but i think he kind of let me mispel tings. _

_ pss. sory it's short too. korean is realy had. _

_ _

_ hope to be yor soulmate, _

_ chenle _

There had been several lines drawn on some words, a few scribbles Jisung tried to understand but didn't quite manage to. It was full of misspellings but if he used to say he hated reading Jaemin's notes, he had found himself appreciating the spelling mistakes for a change.

Chenle took his time to actually try and write him something in his own language even though he could've easily skipped him and found somebody else, somebody who'd fit him better, someone who was better. 

Jisung didn't like taking risks, but if somebody already put so much effort into him… maybe he will.

-

"I'm going to China for the summer vacation." He announced to his friends in the middle of recess. Jaemin almost choked on his rice, and Jeno's eyes spread so wide they were full moons instead of their usual crescents. 

"Liar." Jeno said, but he almost had question marks in his eyes. Jaemin finally managed to clear his throat after a few good, deep coughs and several slaps on his back from Donghyuck's side. Jaemin pushed Donghyuck away from him as the other laughed.

"Since when you are going to China? What are you going to do there? Why are you even going-" Jaemin asked frantically, both of his hands on Jisung's shoulders, rocking him for each question he asked. Sometimes Jisung wondered if Jaemin truly thinks he is his mother, and moments like this only made his believe that  _ yes, yes he does.  _

"Let me answer!" Jisung snapped, and Donghyuck's eyes glinted as he snorted. 

"Don't you yell at your mother." He said, and if Jisung didn't know they'd run jokes on him all day for it, he would've probably stuck his tongue out just out of rebellion. He ignored the comment, albeit annoyed, and just decided to get to the point.

"You remember I told you about.. uh… the soulmate guy?" He asked tentatively, and they all listened closely, getting closer with each word to him, as if they were about to gang up on him.

"The one Donghyuck managed to accidentally introduce you and you eventually hated?" Jeno asked so blatantly that Jisung was literally embarrassed at the thought of that evening in his house, and the following angry texts that he sent to his friends a few days later.

"...Yeah. Uh, I don't hate him anymore." He admitted shyly. “I was overthinking it back then, and… yeah. I don’t hate him anymore.”

"I told you he'd come around! I know his type, he always had this thing for guys who have nice smiles. Remember when he had this crush on you-" Donghyuck started telling Jeno, and Jisung gave him a well deserved kick to the shin.

"Shut the fuck up!" Jisung blushed and hid his face behind his palms, only finding more embarrassment when he wanted support. He should have left them wondering and went missing in action for an entire summer instead.  _ Then they can't laugh at me or ask me for details… _

"So you are going to China?  _ To spend the summer with him?  _ Isn't it too quick? Next thing I know you'll marry him. And before you ask, I don't give you my blessing." Jaemin said, his pout becoming more and more obvious as seconds passed. Jaemin always been the overprotective type of friend, he kind of got used to the cringey antics, but at the same time it sort of scared him that more than likely, he was probably on that path. Of marrying.  _ Gosh, even if he was joking, I can’t help but... _

"If you forget to text him, we're going to suffer from it, so you better will. Also I expect some updates myself, otherwise you aren't getting that free frappuccino ever again." Donghyuck said, reaching up and pulling on Jisung’s cheek. Jisung face soured as if he ate an entire lemon in one go, but just suffered through it. Donghyuck would only go harder if he got annoyed.

“Not like you ever gave me one anyway…” Jisung muttered under his breath, looking away from him.

“This is why we say you are a giant baby.” Jeno remarked, snorting at the sight in front of him.

“This is why I don’t like you anymore.” Jisung retaliated, and both Jeno’s split second of a shocked face and Donghyuck’s witch-like laugh was unbelievably satisfying for Jisung. At the same time people actually looked back to see what made Donghyuck screech like that, and that made him a little bit shy, but it was a bit common to have this happen, so he tried to not let his nervousness show.

“I know, I dodged a  _ bullet. _ ” Jeno emphasised on the last word, acting all defensive and offended for dramatics. It was kind of funny, thinking about how the Jeno he knew two years ago wouldn’t dare say such a thing and especially not for jokes. Both Jaemin and Donghyuck were an influence, even if Jisung didn’t knew if they were a bad or a good one.

“Look at him, all bitter some kid from China is snatching you up, Sungie.” Jaemin grinned instinctively, ganging up on Jeno along with him. Jisung smirked evilly. He always knew he could trust Jaemin. He always helped Jisung tease the others. 

“Jaemin, we’ve been dating for literally a year and a half now.” Jeno deadpanned, his folded hands on his chest and the betrayal on his face pleading Jaemin to come back to his side, but little to no avail. Jaemin just gave his signature, playful smile and carried on.

“Well, I like my boyfriends to be just like my coffee.  _ Bitter.” _

With Donghyuck laughing at the background, and Jeno murmuring about how he hates everything, Jisung felt everything is right. That everything is okay. To think that he will be away from them this summer scared him, but he tried to cast away that thought from his mind.

At least he knew that even if he would hate his choice... he will have a place to return to. A home.

-

Jisung, would never, ever in his life, thought he would be able to stay in a place like this.

It was summer vacation and as promised, he left for China, to try things out with Chenle. His family assured him he will have the option to back out in any moment, and Chenle sent another cute letter about how he was happy Jisung accepted trying things out. It made Jisung feel a little better about his choice.

Now, he knew Chenle’s family was rich. It wasn’t something that he thought about often, more because he tried not to delude himself he will ever get to enjoy such things so easily, but even his own delusions didn’t compare to the gigantic house that was more like a compound than a single building, or the pink magnolia trees that decorated their front yard. The paved ways that had intricate designs on them or the fountain the stood middle way were just things he could never imagine in an actual home, but somehow, the Zhongs defied his imagination.

_ They are literally living in some disney castle…  _ he thought to himself. If he had this sort of home, he isn’t sure if he would ever get out of the house. though considering how many parts the house have, he could probably convince his friends he went sightseeing all across China with some well taken pictures.

Jisung really only snapped out of his daze when his escorts told him they need to keep going. Chenle couldn’t come and bring him himself from the airport, unfortunately, because of private classes he had to take, but at that moment he came off the plane his heartbeat was going like crazy out of nerves, so he was a bit thankful for that. 

Though right now, when he’s about to meet Chenle for real, he had to admit - he was really stressed. He could see some people walking out of the mansion, an entourage of an equally expensive looking family, and Jisung really felt out of place with his plain black t-shirt and even more so with his ripped jeans. He felt like he was going into the UN wearing clown clothes.

He held his breath before the large doors of the entrance opened in front of him. He couldn’t help but hold his sleeves in anxiety. For all the beauty the house held, there was something very intimidating in those big, heavy doors creaking and revealing what was inside. He felt like any moment the doors will be flung shut and toss him out, causing some major concussion on the way.

_ You are overthinking again! _

“Shi-” He almost cursed, but then he realized Chenle and his parents were literally waiting for him at the door.

Jisung might’ve just buried himself 6 feet deep in the ground if he wasn’t frozen in his spot. Chenle’s father did not seem amused, his deep frown not fading any time soon. He couldn’t bring himself to look at Chenle himself, so he just looked at his mother, who was smiling at him.  _ At least that… _

Then again, there was Chenle, who came straight up to him with a much, much bigger smile, and a what he wanted to believe was a whole lot more sincerity in his eyes.

“Jisung!” He called out, his cheeks lifting high while his lips curled up, reaching out to take his hand. It was nearly electrifying, but Jisung sucked it up and stayed in his place, giving his own, tame smile that was still trumped by the shock on his face.

Maybe Jisung melted. Just a little bit. 

“Hi…” He said shyly, feeling lost under Chenle’s gaze and the feeling of his fingers on his own. Even when he let go Jisung could still feel some sense of warmth spreading in the spot he touched. 

Chenle’s father said something, rather grumpily, and Chenle looked back almost apologetically, and went back near his father. One of Jisung’s escorts leaned in near Jisung’s ears. “President Zhong told him to go back, because he went to you without letting them greet their guest properly.” He had explained. Jisung gave a short ‘ah’. That was comforting to know. He looked like he was ready to kill Jisung.

“First of all… welcome to the estate. I hope you'll enjoy your time here. As Chenle’s apparent soulmate, you can do as you please while you are here. I had been interested to see what type of soulmate my son has.” he said apathetically, but he was no longer frowning. His Korean wasn't all that proper, but Jisung still managed to understand. There was something a bit off about it, but hey, it's not like he could speak Chinese perfectly himself. He didn't know it at all. He couldn't judge.

“Your escorts will show you your roo-” He started, but Chenle’s mother, with a deep frown on her face elbowed him shamelessly, making Jisung gasp and Chenle smirk. Her husband didn’t seem pleased, not at all, but she didn’t seem to care at all. She stared straight at his eyes and  _ ordered  _ something in Chinese. He couldn’t judge the words, but he could understand the tone.

Chenle’s father coughed in his hand. “Sorry. Chenle will escort you.  _ Apparently,  _ someone cleared his schedule…” He said with the slightest beat of venom, but Jisung tried not to think about it. At least it wasn’t directed at him. Honestly both of Chenle’s parents kind of scared him.

At least Chenle wasn’t scary.

Jisung found himself at ease now that Chenle came by his side, not even glancing at his father. Chenle seemed to be just happy to look at him, and it made Jisung feel giddy inside, something there erupting with a new type of excitement. When Chenle looked at him, he wasn’t the trash from Seoul’s slumps, and maybe Jisung had low standards to be this whipped in moments, but up until today, he was the low standard, and not it changed.

“Let’s go?” Chenle said, in wavering Korean that was unsure in itself, but Jisung almost got choked up.

“You learned Korean?”  _ For me? _

“A little.” Chenle tried, his hands and fingers signing the ‘little’ more than his words actually spoken it.

_ I should try harder for him, too. I really should. _

-

After a week or so, Jisung got to the conclusion that he felt… good. Comfortable. and maybe even happy, with Chenle. 

It was a weird thing. Everyday Chenle would do his private tutor classes, from piano to business to tennis and all of those fancy things, but watching him made Jisung fixated, in a trans that he couldn’t avoid. He wasn’t lost, or confused, but he was just focused on the moment in front of him.

It was very strange for him, because his thoughts usually tended to wander off, to the realm of the possible and impossible, and to the ins and out of things. But there was nothing to dissect when Chenle played the piano, working out his fingers to his favorite piece while looking at Jisung every once in a while, with a smile prettier than the whole house and all of its glitz and glamour.

Chenle never forgot he was there, and contrary to him who would’ve probably ruined something just because he would be a nervous mess, Chenle was more than willing to include him in absolutely anything. He would shoot him some paper planes while he learned about management and statistics, and have thrown him a bat just so he could be his rival at tennis. 

Even when Chenle fell because Jisung didn’t aim the tennis ball to be a feasible catch, he told his teacher it was okay and waited for Jisung to help him, with his puppy eyes as cute as he was when he was standing next to him, small compared to Jisung’s bigger frame, and even more so when Chenle hugged him after he took care of him.

Jisung was never happier to put a bandaid in his life. 

Yes, there were things that were weird. Like the fact they always had translators around them, literally all of the time. Or those chatty maids that they had hovering around them like bumble bees finding their flowers. Or the fact they were literally in the most guarded and packed house Jisung had ever been to, but none of that really matter. Somehow, they could just communicate. Just.. understand each other, and everything else seemed irrelevant.

_ This is why every time you write a message to the group chat they laugh at you.  _ Jisung admitted, he was painfully crushing on Zhong Chenle, his so called soulmate that he still isn’t convinced he deserves. He is still expecting that somehow it will be revealed that he isn’t the one for Chenle. Because for real, since when cinderella stories like these are ever true? Since when they are real for him?

_ Since you got into this house and discovered you would have been the world’s biggest dumbass if you’ve turned this offer down. _

Right now they were eating, the dinner in front of them as lavish as the house and served on a table that wouldn’t be able to fit in Jisung’s house even if you’d break the walls. You’d imagine all of the butlers and maids and family members and any other person in the staff would fit into this table to eat together, but today it was only him, Chenle, and their goddamn translators that would rather  _ die  _ than leave them alone.

He was so annoyed, but he wouldn’t say a thing. He has a relatively nice reality here, he isn’t going to risk it and make problems. 

Chenle was munching on some fried pork buns that were on the table. Jisung was watching him from the side of his eye, trying to focus on the dumplings that reminded him that Chinese place Ten used to take them to after dance practice. Despite both the great food and memories, it wasn’t all that easy to grab his attention span at the moment, especially when he felt the awkward silence starting to dominate the room. 

His eye caught a stray strand of hair standing in the middle of his hand, defying gravity in a way as unreal as the existence of his soulmate was to him - seems impossible, but it’s still there. Without even thinking about it, Jisung reached out to flatten the stray hair out of habit. He used to do it to Jaemin and Jeno all of the time after dance practice.

Somehow his body kind of forgot that the action kind of makes it necessary to pet someone’s head. 

Chenle froze in his place, his eyes widening a little. Jisung could literally see him swallowing nervously, and he could also see their two translators looking alarmed. Chenle shot them a look, and they didn’t say a word, but Jisung had wondered if he had done something wrong, and was actually very much worried about it. His hand hovered above the other’s head for a while, and he was about to take his hand away, and probably curl into a ball in his room out of embarrassment, but Chenle then held his wrist.

And pressed it into his hand back into his hair, slowly raising his own palm to give one soft squeeze to his hand before returning to eating, letting Jisung give him a couple more pats. 

“Thanks.” Chenle said calmly, yet there was something breathy and shy in the voice that talked. Not exactly his usual, confident and radiant Chenle, but something just as good, that was just shying away from the world.

Jisung decided, that if that’s what being impulsive got him… maybe overthinking should be a thing of the past.

-

It’s the middle of summer, and Chenle had started to just come and go from Jisung room as he’d liked.

Well, not while people are awake.

Both he and Chenle had enough of their constant babysitting done by their translators, and frankly, they didn’t really need them. Chenle had learned quite a bit of Korean by now, and Jisung started understanding the roots of Mandarin, after long hours of practice with Chenle’s friend, Renjun. He only came over a couple of times, but was very approving of the relationship and helped with everything he could. Most of the help was done through the phone, but any time he came over he was gracious enough to help Jisung with Mandarin. Jisung was really starting to believe he and Chenle were soulmates due to this as well.  _ Who the hell actually has a friend that knows both the language of him and his soulmate and was willing to help? _

_ Coincidence? I think not. _

The point was, that in their very own conjoined act of rebellion, the two of them decided they don’t need the translators to watch over them. Although they didn’t have a choice but to be with them by day, if the damn babysitters are sleeping, they can’t really follow them around either.

Every second night, Chenle came to knock on Jisung’s door, two times to be exact, to meet downstairs at the hallway and just to do whatever they wanted. 

This time around Chenle had told him he’ll give him a tour in the outer gardens ahead of time. He had to admit he wasn’t all that interested in flowers, but he decided to not protest. More than anyone else, Chenle has proven that he’s full of surprises, and with hopes he doesn’t come off as wishy-washy, he also more than often find himself liking those surprises.

Jisung was quite lazy in getting ready for these things, though. Today he wore regular black sweatpants along with some black sleeveless shirt, because that's what he literally had on before. Maybe he only drags around Chenle all day, but it’s literally so tiring. He really doesn’t know how Chenle does it all and still have energy. He had gotten more used to it, but even though they did sneak out more than often now, Jisung had to admit he still finds himself napping before that happens. 

_ Chenle thinks it’s cute.  _ He reminded himself. He was often worried about how other people perceived him, but Chenle didn’t really give a damn about it. He smiled just the same no matter if Jisung had spent an hour picking clothes or simply a mere five minutes. More than often he actually saw Chenle coming with the same clothes from the afternoon himself, and that gave him quite a boost that he was doing fine. Even though he knew his hair probably looked like a bird’s nest at the moment, when he heard the two knocks he waited to hear, he couldn’t find himself to care.

He rushed to the door after putting on a pair of slides he had laying around, rubbing his tired eyes. Opening his door carefully, he found Chenle patiently waiting behind it. By now it was a routine - Chenle knocks, waits, and gets an outrageously cute grin on his face as the door finally opens.  _ The highlight of the day,  _ Jisung always thinks. 

“Let’s go?” He said quietly, his head tilted to the side and signaling the way. 

“Yeah.” He answers back. They are both quiet and careful while they are in the hallways, making sure to not alarm or wake anyone. It was lucky that Jisung’s room was not all that far away from the exit to the gardens, because he really cannot be held accountable to the amount of noise he makes when he tries to be careful. This is the only time Chenle is really quiet. It was a strange thing - he always had a big smile when he sees Jisung, but as they sneak away, his expressions become reserved. 

Jisung can’t understand what is the reason for that, but he tried to not let it get to him. After all, overthinking never did him well and especially not with Chenle.

They get to the gardens after a long walk, passing through glass doors that were found in the back of the house. The gardens was full of different flower trees, from wisterias and magnolias and some cherry blossom trees, that stood by gated fields of multicolored flowers and bushes that stood high and designed above them.

“I thought it’d be nice to walk around here.” Chenle stuttered a little, smiling at his feet. Jisung found it adorable how even in the middle of the night, while Chenle looks away from him, he could still see his nose and eyebrows scrunching up as he tried to think of words to say.

“It is pretty. I like it.” Jisung said truthfully, skipping slightly ahead of him and camouflaging himself within the leaves of a wisteria tree that hanged low and dangled around them. “How does it look?” He asked Chenle, making the leaves look like they were his very own lavender long locks. Chenle snorted.

“Purple is more of my color, I think.” Chenle teased as he copied Jisung. He twirled around with a cute pout on his face, and if Jisung had pulled any harder on those viney leaves, he would have plucked quite a few flowers off that tree. He couldn’t even tell if it was because he was cringing or because his soulmate was adorable.

_ His soulmate. _

That had been the first time he thought of him as his soulmate for real. Not for jokes or in quotations. The first time he actually, fully believed it enough that he let his mind call Chenle his soulmate. His hands left the vines of the tree abruptly as he backed away from the trees, all of the sudden much more nervous than before. 

“Jisung?” Chenle called and came up to him, his eyes examining the taller. He scanned him as if looking for a problem, but evidently couldn’t find it. His eyes finally focused on his head. “Uh, you have some flowers in your hair.. can I?...” He said, his hand reaching to the top of Jisung’s hair. If Jisung let his mind speak, the first answer would be  _ fuck, you are really doing this to me now,  _ and the second would be  _ I’m not sure if my heart can take that right now,  _ but of course, he couldn’t answer with either of those.

“Yeah, sure.” Jisung said, lowering his head. He gulped as he felt Chenle’s hand touching head, scattering away the petals that found home in his hair. All he could do was look at Chenle’s face as he cleared away the flowers. His muscles were already aching because he couldn’t bring himself to move, and his eyes were completely set on the boy, only finding some shame to look away when Chenle suddenly returned his gaze. Jisung looked away immediately, but found himself lifting his eyes back up quickly as the other moved.

one of Chenle’s hands trailed down his face, cupping it. Jisung’s breath hitched, and he almost flinched away as his heartbeat raced. He could feel it in his throat, but he couldn’t find himself focusing, not on anything. He felt so stressed. 

_ Are we going to kiss now? How am I supposed to do it? I’m going to make this embarrassing. He’s going to think I’m such a loser, I… _

Jisung’s thought stopped when he felt Chenle’s other hand holding his own, squeezing it in reassurance. 

_ He already knows me so well. _

Jisung inhaled in and out, calming himself down further.  _ Just let it happen. _

He closed his eyes.

He felt Chenle’s lips pressing gently against his own, very slowly starting to move. Jisung relaxed into the kiss carefully, letting himself take the feeling in and respond to the other. It took them time before they found themselves comfortably aligned, but Jisung enjoyed the process, from how it let him explore the new act and what came with it. Chenle’s encouraging fingers caressing the nape of his neck made him want to dive in, closer - and he couldn’t be happier as he enveloped Chenle in his hands, giving him more of a hug rather than the traditional hands on the waist.

_ My soulmate… _

The kiss ended as soon as it began, and Jisung felt a little regretful, but even more so hopeful for more in the future. He couldn’t bring himself to release Chenle quite so soon, though. Jisung cozied up to him, sinking his head in his hair while Chenle’s head was more or less trapped underneath his own. He could hear Chenle laughing lightheartedly, snuggling into him. It made Jisung smile.  _ My soulmate. _

They were stuck in their own world for quite a while, and Jisung was grateful for it… but at the same time, when finally the wake up call came, it was not as sweet.

“President Zhong asks to see you in the dining room immediately.” A voice said from behind them. It was one of their translators. Chenle jumped away from Jisung at the sound of the voice, and the scared look on Chenle’s face made him worry. He looked absolutely terrified, alternating his gaze from Jisung to the translator.

The man in front of them added something in Chinese, and Jisung could understand it meant  _ now.  _ Chenle exhaled in defeat.

“We need to go..” He said quietly, looking at Jisung with a bittersweet smile. Jisung didn’t know what was so wrong, but he could tell something was incredibly, incredibly wrong. He took Chenle’s hand, and just like Chenle did before to him, he squeezed it. He wasn’t going to let the other be so scared on his own. Without letting go of his hand, he started walking towards the translator, ready to be led away.

“Okay.” was all he could utter, but at least Chenle managed to give a little smile at that.

-

He had never seen a person this angry in his life. 

Chenle’s father was standing in front of his son, yelling as if his life depended on it. If he was any closer to Chenle he would be literally spitting at his face. Jisung had no idea what was going on. Chenle’s father was speaking way too fast for him to get anything, and Chenle himself was just glaring daggers at him as he yelled.

Even when Chenle finally opened his mouth, criticizing and clearly mad, he couldn’t really understand why the fight so heated. Was his father really that mad that they snuck out? They weren’t even out of the estate area, they were on the property! It didn’t make sense at all. 

Chenle’s father suddenly pointed at Jisung, hammering in some more words that Jisung grew more and more scared to know the meaning of. Chenle shoved his hand away and started yelling himself. Jisung’s ears rang, he could swear that if Chenle’s voice was able to break things, it would’ve have broken the entire house by now. His heart was booming at his chest, and not in a pleasant way like before.

After a few more yells and Chenle almost pushing his father from frustration, the man seemed to be completely done with him, and approached Jisung instead. Every single step of the businessman seemed like an earthquake in the making and Chenle followed him, panicking, holding onto both of his hands to stop him, but eventually he was only pushed away.

“I want to make this very clear right now - the only reason you are here is to convince my idiot of a son he needs to marry the right sort. He has a good girl that we set him up with long ago, and if I didn’t let his mother convince me that trying this soulmate thing to satisfy his curiosity would make him let go of that ‘real love’ delusion, you would’ve never been here.” His father spoke clearer than ever before. Jisung was choked up, processing the words.  _ All of this time I was a part of a plan? _

“As if he’d marry a street vermin like you. You think he likes you so much, when he begged us to not go through with his engagement, asking us to consider every single possible guy instead even  _ after  _ he first met you. The Wongs, The Lius, The Xiaos…. until you agreed to show up, unfortunately. Wasn’t he happy, thinking he found a way out. To believe his mother made me give you way into our home.”

Jisung was on the verge of tears. 

He really didn’t allow himself to believe in most of his delusions, but he also couldn’t help but think that what was going on was for real. Chenle’s gaze and the way he talked and the way he treated Jisung were always tender and sweet and he never, ever complained about Jisung, always happy and shining near him, like a sun that never left the sky.

_ But if he needed you, then of course he would show his best side to you. How else would he get you to stay? _

Tears ran down Jisung’s face quicker than he could even process that thought, and they only fell quicker and quicker as he thought about Chenle looking at anyone else, thinking they could be in his place. He wanted to dig a hole and bury himself in the ground.  _ I should’ve known. _

_ I should’ve known. _

Chenle came up to him, holding his wrists, still panicking. “Jisung, I swear I like you now, I’m not lying, please….” He started, and he also continued it, but Jisung couldn’t hear one word beyond the first sentence.  _ I swear I like you  _ ** _now. _ ** He really wanted to die. Chenle’s father didn’t lie, and his son was not going against his words.

_ I’m so stupid. _

Chenle tried to hug him, apologizing frantically, but Jisung pushed him away. He couldn’t bring himself to look at the other right now. He couldn’t bring himself to look at anything except his own feet, and later on his arms that he kept wiping his face with. In the end, he found himself on the floor, with his face hiding behind his knees as he hugged himself. 

Chenle’s father said something in Chinese, and a few of the translators came in the scene and dragged Chenle away. Jisung could hear him yelling, but there was no point to it. His yells were slowly getting smaller and smaller as he was pulled further away, and Jisung didn’t know if he should feel good or bad about it. He didn’t know how he should feel at all.

“Pack your things. We got you plane tickets already. You are getting out of this house by 10 am.” Chenle’s father said frankly, before leaving the room for Jisung to sob on his own.

He guessed it didn’t matter how he felt, anyway.

_ Soulmates my ass.  _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay i KNOW you all hate me, but i SWEAR this had to be done aaaaa i have so much tags to add RIP but anyways please lemme know what you think???  
you can find me on twitter @keusookie and cc is @yanvels if u want to talk as well~ have a good day/evening!


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> the ending is finally here!!! <:   
honestly i never thought this piece will be liked by so many peple but ;;; i'm glad to see people have liked it. Thank you for anyone who commented and sorry i put yall through this despair lmao last chapter was MAD dramatic HAHA. anyway just notes: not a native english speaker, as i said before! there's a bunch of explanations here, so sorry abt info dumps kljkljddlkj but anyway i hope you will enjoy!

It had been two years every since he left Chenle’s house.

He still thinks about it from time to time. Still dreams about the summer days where he truly felt safe and happy in. Still trying to forget the airplane ride back home, where he cried for the entire ride and couldn’t stop. Chenle has tried to contact him after it, several times, but Jisung had him blocked before he could be swayed into being a fool again. 

Forgetting was not easy. He had to distract himself to no end - going out with Jaemin, Jeno, and Donghyuck on a near everyday basis just so he won’t be left alone with his thoughts. He had drowned himself in studying and dance practice, to the point Ten had to tell him off after they realized he ruptured a ligament. He dated two boys in those two years, both lovely people who Jisung hated to admit were rebounds that never helped him recover.

Yoonjun was an amazing person he met in a dance competition. He was incredibly charismatic and even prepared a dance routine for both of them after they dated for three months. He was always giving away from himself and Jisung just took, and took, and took. He felt horrible for thinking about Chenle when they had danced to love songs together, and it was what eventually made Jisung break up with him after six months. 

Jeongin was the other boy, a guy he had met through Donghyuck. Jeongin was also a great person, sunny and sweet, but just like how it was with Yoonjun, Jisung had still been stuck on Chenle instead. It was an awful thing, but Jisung has been comparing him to Chenle on all levels throughout the relationship. Jeongin broke up with him later when he understood they weren’t working out, fortunately. He was extremely nice about it, and it spared Jisung feeling like an absolutely horrible guy for the second time. Ever since that, Jisung couldn’t even bring himself to bother significant others.

_ They’re just not him.  _

Jisung had thought about this every single day, about how much of an idiot he is for not being able to let go of a person that clearly wasn’t nearly as in love with him as he was. He hated the fact that he still dreamt about Chenle, the songs he used to sing to himself. He hated how he had all those Jay Chou songs on his phone just because it reminded him of the singing lessons Chenle has had. He hated that he was still infatuated, even with everything that happened.

_ He didn’t like you, he never did, stop thinking about him. _

It was really a cruel joke by fate, how it all happened, and how fucked up he turned out after it. He remember crying on his mothers for days on end at the beginning, and how she had it in herself to toss out hundreds of won worth of money in the form of the Zhong’s company products just because Jisung wasn’t able to look at them without becoming sad.

The only good thing he had ever gotten out of it was Donghyuck making him that free frappuccino for four weeks straight, and even that was spoiled for him because Chenle’s favorite starbucks menu was the damn frappuccino. Strawberries and creme. More milk than water because it was important. And- 

_ Shut the fuck up, why do you even remember that?!  _

Jisung was so frustrated and sad, it was inexplicable. The only thing he was grateful for was that his older friends (only friends, in fact) moved in for college already, so they didn’t have to see him in that state. They were all in some good school he couldn’t really afford studying at, so while he was beginning to to prepare for his community college, where he would be on scholarship, they were coming back home for a few days for the summer break.

He sounds jealous, but it wasn’t like he ever thought it would be different. He had always expected to not be able to learn at college at all - thank god for the scholarship and his good rep for donating blood every damn year, because now at least he can. He was glad his friends were able to get to nicer places as well. It’s what they really deserved, especially after taking such a good care of him these past years.

He doesn’t know what he would have done without them. He was so lucky to have them by his side at that horrible time. Jeno personally drove all the way to Incheon to pick him up after he called him crying. Jaemin had him over for three days before he could bring himself to tell his parents what happened. Donghyuck came to visit him each day just to make sure he ate, giving him stuff from the shop. No matter what happens, at least he has them to trust. Even if he can’t bring himself to trust anyone new, at least he knew that he had some people that were worthy of it.

Donghyuck has recently found a boyfriend in his new college, and was extremely hyped about bringing him over for the summer. Apparently he was an exchange student that had been preparing to spend most of their summer vacation doing practically nothing but work, but Donghyuck caught him by the neck and made him promise that he would come over.

So his mid-June to mid-August plans seemed pretty solid: he’s gonna have a nice time seeing his friends again, celebrating both Nana’s birthday and Liberation day with everyone, meeting a new person that  _ definitely  _ deserves all the admiration in the world, considering he could handle Donghyuck’s incredibly overbearing personality, and  _ the most important thing,  _ he’s going to fifth wheel all of these couples to death, and this year he was  _ not  _ going to cry over it.

Well, that’s what he tried promising to himself, at least.

-

Jisung had been been prepared to whatever came his way, at this point. He overcame his father’s cooking that time his mother went on a business trip for a week, he overcame Yoonjoon’s taking off his shoes after dance practice even though the smell made him want to barf, he overcame that one time the power went out for two days and he had to go a PC room to be able to  _ study  _ for an upcoming exam.

He had enough on his plate that he had to tolerate on a daily basis and managed, and he believed he would be able to do it with anyone new he met - he tolerated Jeno’s cousin, Doyoung, and the way he constantly nagged at them, he tolerated his dance teachers, Ten and Taeyong, each time they had decided his routines contained too much popping, he tolerated enough people in the Zhong estate back at the time he lived there, and he wasn’t going to talk about that, but….

The memories resurfaced, because despite it being the one thing Jisung could never imagine happening, ever - Donghyuck’s new, smart, funny and handsome exchange student boyfriend was in fact, Huang Renjun, Chenle’s smart, funny, and handsome best friend. The same person who taught him Chinese, the same guy that was incredibly happy about his and Chenle’s relationship, the same person from the past Jisung did not want to remember. 

They were in Jaemin’s house, a nice apartment with an even nicer view to Han River. Jaemin’s parents were on business trip three hundred days from an entire total of three hundred thirty five of an year, so they had the apartment for themselves. He was so excited seeing everyone again, he was so happy to finally hang out with his friends after a long while that he had been drowning within his studies, but now…

“What are you doing here?” He glowered at Renjun, ready to smash something, and this time certainly not on accident. Jeno, Jaemin, and especially Donghyuck snapped their heads to look at him, all having varying levels of frowns on their faces. Jaemin walked up to him, putting a hand on his shoulder.

“Yah, you didn’t even tell us hello yet, you punk. I didn’t raise you like this-” Jaemin started, but got shoved away pretty quickly by Jisung. Jaemin didn’t fall or anything, but he visibly flinched at Jisung’s expression as the entire mood in the room became almost dangerous. Renjun looked like a deer in the headlights, suddenly registering who he was and releasing an loud, exhausted sigh that made Jisung absolutely  _ fume. _

_ You acted like I was such a blessing when I was there… fucking fakes, all you ever did was use me! _

_ “Fucking speak! I know damn well you can!”  _ He yelled at him as he had gotten closer, now towering over Renjun that had stayed the same height he had been two years ago, while Jisung only grew more and more. Renjun didn’t look at him in the eye, and Donghyuck, who up until this point stayed silent out of shock, finally got in the middle and pushed Jisung back.

“What’s gotten into you, you idiot?! Did you lose your fucking mind when we were not here?! Get OFF my boyfriend!” Donghyuck shouted, staring right into Jisung’s eyes. Jisung had always felt what happened to him was fate fucking him over for laughs, but at this point this was just beating a dead horse. Except that he wasn’t dead, and the salt the spread all over his wounds is being pressed right into them just to hurt some more.

“Your boyfriend was my  _ soulmate’s  _ best fucking friend. Hope he doesn’t lie to you about his feelings like he lied to me about Chenle’s.” He said bitterly, and Renjun had the audacity to look at him right in the eye. Had the audacity to look  _ upset.  _ Donghyuck, Jeno and Jaemin all looked at Renjun in both shock, processing.

“I’m not a liar, you overgrown dimwit, and  _ maybe _ if you had half a brain you would have answered Chenle’s calls and knew that without me telling you.” He replied fearlessly, eyebrows furrowed and his hands folded. Jisung did a lot of popping in his life, but right now he felt like he could pop a vein easily if he pressed his fists just a little bit stronger. 

“He looked for other fucking guys to date after he freaking knew me, I know exactly what I have been for him, you dick!” He yelled back. He could honestly cry, but this time he felt like his anger trumped his sadness. All this time he had tried to get over Chenle and now that piece of his past is coming back to not only haunt him but shake him up again. Life can be shitty, but he’s tired of taking the hits from it. He came up to him again, and he was really ready to just swing at Renjun, but of course, the didn’t come that easy.

All three of the other boys came in the middle of the two of them, Jeno and Jaemin forcing Jisung to sit while Donghyuck was holding onto Renjun, whispering some stuff to him angrily. They both looked upset, but finally Donghyuck got Renjun to sit with him on the opposing couch. 

“If you are going to fight inside my house you are all literally getting kicked out. No exceptions. So talk it out before I’m cancelling the pizza I ordered because you all DEFINITELY do not deserve getting any piece of it right now.” Jaemin said looking at him, Renjun and Donghyuck, though definitely the focus was on him and Renjun alone. Renjun looked at the floor, finally seeming to have a little bit of shame, but Jisung was just honestly hurt, because even though  _ all of them  _ knew what happened to him, they are still giving this dude a chance.

_ Even my own friends are turning against me now? Fucking great. _

“This is really fucking unbelievable, did you all forget how I was tossed at the airport two years ago? After that idiot practically admitted he didn’t even care about me? And you are still giving this dwarf a chance-” 

“Boo fucking hoo, you got your heart broken because you have the attention span of a goldfish and never cared to know anyone’s problems other than your own. At least Lele tried to fix it, but you never fucking gave him the time to explain.” Renjun cut him off, and Jisung almost came up from the couch to hit him but Jaemin and Jeno were no slouches. They kept him in his own place with hard stares and even harder grips. 

“Please, give me an explanation to why he would go to  _ three  _ different people after he knew me, if I mattered  _ so much  _ to him. And that’s just what his father listed, maybe there were even more. Do you know how humiliated I was? Imagine losing your first kiss just to know thirty minutes later that your partner wouldn’t give a crap if you were somebody else!” He barked at him, and although that had not fazed Renjun almost at all, Donghyuck was looking like he was beginning to lose it, looking extremely distressed. 

Renjun held his hand as he saw that himself, and Jisung actually felt actual tears coming down his face.  _ Exactly what he did to me before he let me go. _

“You want the whole story? I’ll give you  _ the whole story _ .” Renjun yelled so hard it felt like it echoed through the room, as everyone were registering his words. Jisung gritted his teeth, but from the way the rest were already attentive to hear what happened, he knew he had no choice but listen. “You already knew that from his father, but Chenle was engaged. It wasn’t decided all that long before you came around. The girl’s name is Ningning, and she used to be Chenle’s best friend. Ever since they were five and met through their families they were close. Their families got to a mutual agreement because their business will both gain from conjoining the companies.” Renjun took in a heavy breathe, and continued.

“But of course, this doesn’t really sit well, because Chenle, is in fact,  _ gay,  _ and no matter how much he liked Ningning, he didn’t want to marry her. For months on months Lele begged his parents to not do this to him, saying he wanted to experience real love. His mother eventually convinced his father to let Chenle take the DNA test to find a soulmate, which he agreed to because he thought it’ll convince Chenle to stop yapping about true love and shit. They found you. And I cannot tell you how excited Chenle was.” Renjun said, and Jisung trembled at the last sentence, but he wouldn’t break. This still doesn’t explain anything.

“I remember him being so excited over meeting you beforehand. Sending me texts the minute he left the shop saying how cute you were and how his heart skipped a beat when you said your name, because then he knew that you are the one he was supposed to meet, and that fate really wanted you together. Imagine how bad I felt for him as he texted me unreadable, full of typos texts saying you cried your eyes out and hated him. His father told him you absolutely hated the idea of being with him when they went back home, and on the same breathe said they had decided on the wedding date for him and Ningning. Chenle couldn’t stop crying for days, you dumbass.” Renjun said it so sharply, Jisung cringed. He wasn’t wrong, he did do that, but he never even knew about those things…

“So me, being a good friend, told him to suggest to his family actually gay guys from rich families that maybe they’ll be willing to consider instead.  _ Because clearly,  _ if you didn’t want him and his family is already putting pressure on him, he is running out of time and options. So yes, he did suggest them, because he  _ literally  _ thought you hated him. But he still asked me to help him write a letter to you, even though I thought it was a total waste of time. You know why he did that? Because even when knew that you were a slim chance, he wanted to bet on you.  _ He liked you so much.  _ It was incredibly dumb, he even turned down a date with Liu  _ fucking  _ Yangyang, whose family owns  _ literally  _ half of the entertainment industry in China. All because you suddenly accepted to try things with him.” Renjun nearly ripped his own hair as he said it. The amount of frustration that went through his voice and body hit Jisung with immense force.

_ I… he’s lying. There’s no fucking way. There is no fucking way this actually happened. _

“When the entire fight happened Chenle said that he liked me  _ now.  _ He practically admitted that he didn’t care for me before. If you are going to say he liked me so much, at least you need to make it consistent!” He replied as his last line of defense, but even as he said it, he felt shaky. This is all what he had to go by the last few years, all he knew and all that haunted him. If Renjun breaks that too…

“You big moron, of course he said he likes you now. Do you know how much time it takes for Chenle to admit he likes somebody? Fucking years if you go by how much it took him to tell me he appreciates me. Do you know how many people in his life used him for his wealth? Do you know how many people hurt him just because he trusted them too easily? He grew defensive over the years. He wouldn’t admit to liking anyone if he knew them only for a few days. Yeah, he’s friendly and all, but he would never let people use him like that anymore.” Renjun said so blatantly that Jisung actually felt like he was being stabbed repeatedly with a knife. 

_ Stop it. You are lying. You are lying… _

“Also, of course you don’t know this, because you never fucking bothered to, but I said Ningning used to be Chenle’s best friend in past tense because she’s the main offender of using him. After getting so close to him she apparently developed a crush on him or something, which isn’t all that bad, only that she decided to tell her parents to strike up the marriage proposal. Convinced them that since they were so close they should be together, and that his parents would help their company. Mind you, this was  _ long after  _ he told her he was gay. He hasn’t spoken to her since. Not willingly at least.” 

Silence. All eyes were on Jisung and as much as he wanted to scream, or shout, or do anything else but accept all of this - all he could manage to do was hyperventilate, barely able to keep his mortification contained.

Crying. He got used to crying. He had done it quite enough when it came to Chenle, but this had definitely hit him the hardest. This was all his fault. This was on him, not being there for his soulmate and speaking about his troubles, never answering his calls and believing him when he should've.

_ I always fuck things up.  _

"I'm bringing him water." Jeno said from above of him, but he couldn't even lift his head up. His face had sunk into his palms as his whole body shuddered.  _ Did he have to marry her?  _ As soon as the thought crossed his mind he wanted to hurl. If Chenle is married to some psycho bitch because he wasted his time Jisung will never, ever forgive himself. 

"Is he…. Did he get…" Jisung tried, words mumbled and barely coherent, but anyone with a brain could understand where this was going. Jisung's red eyes were finally revealed to the rest as he lifted his head for Renjun's answer, who finally looked a little sympathetic towards Jisung.

"No. He didn't marry her." Renjun answered quietly and Jisung held his chest, a stone falling off of his heart.  _ Thank god… thank god!  _ He was a mix of so many emotions at that same moment, and he could only be grateful that relief was one of them. At least one thing that he could hold onto in the middle of this storm.

"He got disowned. His dad told him that if he’s not marrying her, he doesn’t need him in his house. He lives in Korea with his cousin now. Honestly, I don't think I would have come here if it wasn't for him." Renjun admitted, his eyes lingering over Donghyuck. "Glad I did, but… wish it was for better circumstances." He added, wistful as his thumb drew circles on Donghyuck’s palm.

Jisung sank into his chair, trying to process everything he was told. He felt his head pounding as he did. There were no excuses right now. There were so many questions in his head that he wanted to ask, so many things he was scared to know, but his mouth ran faster than his mind now that the floodgates were open and he couldn’t block out the knowledge any longer.

“W-when did he leave? The estate, I mean…” He asked quietly, his anger long forgotten, replaced with feelings of defeat and to some extent, even horror.

Renjun also seemed calmer now. This was no longer a battle of pride that it was before. It was a mutual understanding of how fucked up the situation really was as the truth that was buried for two years had finally been dug up and showcased to the world.

“Three days after you did. The wedding was set to be somewhere in the autumn, so they fought almost immediately after you left. Lived in my house for a week before his cousin before his cousin finally suggested that he’ll come over to him. Kun-ge really helped a lot.” Renjun explained. 

Jisung wanted to rip his hair out. To throw something on the floor, to punch a wall.  _ Chenle called me three days after it and I didn’t answer.  _ Jeno came back with a glass of water, after something that felt like years. Jisung didn’t even want to look at it. He was a mess - full of snot and tears and most of all, regret. Jaemin was holding him from behind, hands on his shoulder, holding him, and Jisung wondered if he even deserved it, knowing the while he found his place within his friends when he returned to Korea, Chenle was kicked out from his home.

_ Korea. Renjun said he’s in Korea, right now… _

“Where is he? Where does he live?” Jisung asked abruptly, his heart speeding up as he said the words. He was running on dangerous territory, but this has been eating him for years, and the thought that maybe, just maybe, he could do something to fix it…

“...Listen, I don’t know if I should tell you. He’s just starting to get better. He hadn’t gotten into a relationship since and is just starting to come out of his shell again. I know you went through a lot, but so did he, and if you aren’t willing to actually listen to him and believe in him, I’ll be honest, I don’t want you anywhere near him.” Renjun said sincerely. Donghyuck gave Renjun a look, but Renjun was stern and unyielding. 

Jisung felt all of his muscles clench up. He knew he didn’t have the right to force it out of him, but at the same time he desperately needed to know.

“Please. I need to know. I didn’t know it was like this. He never told me, I’m…” Jisung looked for words, but couldn’t find ones that can accurately describe what he was feeling, or how much he needed this. Renjun bit his lips, and tried to avoid most of the eyes in the room, but Donghyuck managed to catch his gaze within his own anyway.

“Junnie, I was their first matchmaker, you know? Made them talk to each other when they first met. I was working at the place they first met. If I thought Sungie will deliberately hurt someone I wouldn’t have let him bug my customer. Like… he’s a brat, but he’s a good brat. And I promise you, with the way he’s still hung up on Chenle for two years now.. he’d never hurt him.” Donghyuck spoke softly, in a way that Jisung hadn’t quite seen before. He’s never overtly sentimental, but everything he did spoke volumes on how much he cared. 

Renjun hesitated, but looked back at Jisung. “You better not hurt him, because if you do…” 

“I won’t. I really won’t. I swear I won’t-” Jisung could honestly have kept it going on for a while, but even with Renjun looking suspicious and seeming more reminiscent of a mafia boss rather than a college student, he didn’t seem to need too much persuasion at that point. 

“Fine, I’ll jot it down for you so you can have it on you. You better make things right.” Renjun eventually said, and the relief that washed over the room was evident as several sighs were heard. 

Jisung might’ve been the most relieved person in the room, but Donghyuck was the one that was the happiest. He had caught Renjun’s face in his hands, giving him quick pecks all over his face until his now smiling boyfriend finally shoved his face away from him, only to be trapped in a hug instead. 

“Thank you, Junnie.” Donghyuck said as he practically nuzzled him.

Even though he should have been happy, knowing that he will be able to see Chenle again, worry overtook Jisung as he watched the two in front of him. 

_ I hope…. that this time, we could be like that, as well. _

-

_ He wouldn’t send me to the wrong address, right?  _

It was a bit strange, to find himself in the northern ‘poor’ neighbourhoods of Seoul. It didn’t really bother Jisung, after all, he lived in a worse neighbourhood himself, but…. It was a bit hard for him to imagine Chenle living in this area. To imagine someone he knew to be so vibrant to live in such a gloomy area, away from the bright city lights that Jisung used to associate him with.

The address he was given directed him to some apartment complex, a rather shabby looking one. The only thing grand about it was the width of the structure, that was separate to what probably was small apartments. ffive floors, with five doors placed in each one. Jisung could only imagine it was a cramped space, and more than likely not a well maintained one, judging by how the walls were peeling, and the safety rail the stood in front of each door row was rusty and honestly looked uncomfortable to touch.

He carefully entered the complex’s grounds, noticing a few people watching him as they smoked, bent over the rail of the third floor. Jisung was immensely grateful that Chenle’s cousin lived in the second floor, because these people looked intimidating. He averted his gaze and went up the stairs to the side of the building, two floors of heavy steps and sense of dread that he never quite felt before.

The apartment Chenle lived in was apartment number seven, according to the Renjun has wrote him. As much as he didn’t want to admit it, he stood there and watched the apartment from afar for a couple of minutes more than he would consider okay. His steps were careful, as if he still wanted to hide away from everything - but he knew that nothing from here forward would be in his comfort zone, and at this point, he didn’t want it to be.

Apartment number nine, from the outside, seemed like any other apartment. The door had a bunch of advertisements stuck on it, and he could see a couple of letters shoved into the mailbox near it. The letters themselves didn’t really matter to him though. What mattered was the name that was written on a half peeling sticker on top of it - Qian Kun.

_ Renjun didn’t send me to some random street, thank god.  _ He wasn’t extremely worried about it, but the thought passed in his mind as he remembered calling him a dwarf as well as cursing at him without much of a justification. Regardless, had he done it, he’s sure Donghyuck wouldn’t let it slide, so he guessed it was a needless worry. 

Realizing he had wasted a few more good minutes just examining the door, Jisung decided he needs to get a hold of himself. He lifted his fisted hand, his heart drumming faster and faster as it rose. He felt like he was about to choke but at the same time he couldn’t bring himself to give in to his insecurities. Not when he came this far.

Jisung knocked.

There wasn’t an immediate response from within, but Jisung straight away inhaled all the air he stopped breathing halfway into that process. It stressed him out that the only sounds he could hear was the laughter of the smokers from the floor above, so he knocked again, a bit louder, a bit faster. He just needed to see this through. He just wanted to see Chenle again. 

_ Is that too much to ask? _

“Coming!” A voice called from within, and Jisung jumped away from at as if he had been burnt. It wasn’t Chenle, that’s for sure. Jisung felt his nerves building up again. It was probably Chenle’s cousin, and he was a bit scared of meeting him. He probably knew the whole story and was there too see all of Chenle’s pain, more than anyone else…  _ I hope he doesn’t hate me. _

The door creaked open to show a man, slightly shorter than him, with chocolate brown eyes and matching hair. He looked… nice. Like that type of person you could just look at and could tell was kind, with his dimples showing easily and the hesitant, believing smile that he had.  _ They vaguely look similar…  _

“Hello. You are…?” He asked, looking at him with expecting eyes that made him feel even more pressured than he had been before. Jisung felt the urge to bow in forgiveness, but figured it would be way too weird to do so without even explaining who he was.

“Uh… hello. Uhm, I’m here to see Chenle…” He said hesitantly, his hand tucked behind his back as he desperately tried to not break eye contact no matter how much he wanted to. The other looked at him up and down, examining him as some sort of realization appeared on his face.  _ It’s going to be okay, it’s going to be okay….  _ Jisung chanted in his mind. He really damn hoped it will be.

“Oh. You are…. I got it. Renjun did tell me you will come…” The man said, no hostility found in his voice, but his smile disappeared. “My name is Qian Kun. I’m Chenle’s cousin. Your name is Jisung, right?” Kun asked quietly, as he opened the door a bit wider, as if allowing him to enter. Jisung nodded slowly, but haven’t moved from his spot. He didn’t want to seem rude and just go in. Kun probably had enough thoughts on him anyway.

“Come in, I have some things of the stove.. we can talk in the kitchen.” He said as he entered himself, Jisung scurrying after him inside, closing the door behind him. The place was as small as expected. Living room and kitchen connected, and two doors in a narrow hallway, for what Jisung assumed were their rooms. That being said, it was tidy and well kept so it really wasn’t all that bad.

Kun came back behind the stove, and Jisung took a seat behind a small table near the wall. He was cooking some sort of a noodle dish, and it smelled nice. Jisung felt a little relieved knowing that Chenle was still able access proper food and have general good living conditions. When Renjun said he got disowned, he honestly freaked out inside. He was really glad none of his nightmares came true.

“So… you know how much you hurt him already, right?” Kun asked as he started working on the noodles’ sauce, swirling it around and acting as if he asked the most regular thing in the world. Jisung coughed from absolutely nothing.

“Y-yes, sir.” He said nervously, and Kun laughed at his response easily, smiling to himself.

“I know you are here to sort things out. I think it’s good that you are here, actually.” He started it out nicely, but Jisung knew there was more as Kun’s expression became more stern. “But I just need to say this.. if you are not serious about him, then please leave him alone. He just started getting out to the world again. If it’s not for real then keep it.” He said seriously. Jisung gulped.

“I’m serious about this, sir.” Jisung answered, making sure to sounds stable and sure of himself. Kun looked back at him and gave him an accepting grin. Jisung felt a little relieved at that, but he didn’t let it show. He wanted to make a good impression on Chenle’s cousin, especially because he definitely means to come here more often if Chenle will allow it.

“Good, then.” He stated simply, coming back to the boiling pot of sauce in front of him. “Chenle just finished his shift at work I think. He’s supposed to be here pretty soon, so I hope you are prepared.” Kun mentioned. Jisung didn’t know if he was prepared. He had many things things to say, but he felt like no matter how much he will tell Chenle, it wouldn’t be enough. He sighed deeply. There’s no point in overthinking it now.

“He works now?” He asked instead. It wasn’t a surprise that Chenle found himself a job. He was always hardworking in his tutoring classes and seemed honestly invested in building up his future. Chenle is so smart, as well. Anyone would be lucky to have someone like him working for them.

“Yeah. He insists on helping me pay for this apartment now, so he grabbed the first job he could. He’s a cashier in a store at chinatown, it’s not too far away from here. He’s taking a bit too many shifts lately, I think. Hopefully you’ll get him to tone it down, though.” He said with an undertone of worry. Jisung frowned.

“He’s overworking?”

“I think he does. He doesn’t sleep well at nights, nightmares and stuff. But he never let’s himself rest. I think he feels safer if he keeps moving, but… It worries me that he cannot relax.” Kun sighed. Jisung swallowed at the thought that he is probably one of the reasons for that. It was more than likely. Jisung bit his lips. Would Chenle even want to see his face?

He barely even had time to think over it when he heard a noise from the entrance.

“Ah. He’s here.” Kun commented quietly, his worries still evident on his face as he looked at Jisung, who was positively terrified, already up from his chair. Jisung had a million thoughts running through his head - he couldn’t bring himself to think straight, much less figure out a plan of what to do. 

He was so scared, so scared of Chenle’s reaction. He was already praying for the best, but even his prayers halted as he heard a loud, familiar creak. The front door opened. 

“Kun-ge, I’m home.” was spoken in perfect Chinese. Chenle’s voice echoed through the house and Jisung was filled with anxiety and worry, but although his frozen state had kept him in his place, he knew he couldn’t escape Chenle for too long. This small apartment could only hide him for so long.

“What are you cooking? Smells good-” Chenle had started to say as he came into the kitchen, but stopped in his tracks the second he had seen Kun was not alone. His eyes lingered over Jisung for a few long seconds, and Jisung stared at him back, unable to hide any of the feelings he had kept to himself up until now. It just hit different, seeing Chenle in his branded work shirt and his messy hair that used to be kept styled. 

Chenle’s mouth was kept agape until he managed to get back to his sentence. Jisung expected shoutes, or cursing, or anything else that could show that Chenle was angry or hurt, but instead, he got something much worse - the view of Chenle tearing up right before shutting his mouth and leaving, running away from Jisung as if he was a fire that was here to burn him.

Kun sighed from behind Jisung. “I’d suggest you’d go catch him before you won’t have a chance to.” 

Jisung never processed any sentence faster. Before he knew, his legs already brought him to the door, open wide as it was flung by Chenle just a few seconds before. He could see him going down the stairs from afar, and Jisung managed to find incomparable willpower to catch up with him on time. He ran over in the biggest steps he could’ve taken until he was finally next to him, having him cornered to the side of stairs. 

“Chenle,” Jisung said as the other tried to walk away from him, refusing to look at him. “Chenle, please.” Jisung already came closer, too close for Chenle to actually be able to escape. The older tucked himself to the corner of the wall, trying to make himself as small as possible. He was completely silent, unlike how Jisung knew him to be. 

_ This is my fault. _

“Chenle, I’m sorry. I’m so, so so sorry.” He apologized profusely, his eyes centering on his soulmate, the person he actually believed could be his soulmate, the person he yearned to believe he could be with. “I’m sorry. I didn’t know what you’ve been through. I didn’t know how that arranged marriage came to be, I didn’t know how much you gave up for me. I met Renjun, he told me everything…”

The other stayed quiet, unmoving as Jisung kept on going. “I never wanted to hurt you. I didn’t understand why would you choose to know someone else if you looked at me as your soulmate. I felt hurt and confused because I was jealous hearing about those other rich boys and I wanted to be the only one, like you were for me. I didn’t deserve you at that time, you kept enduring the stupid shit I did while I barely kept an ear open for you. I’m so sorry, Chenle, I didn’t mean to.”

“I was so scared, because I never believed in all these fairytales and you were one knocking straight on my door and slapping me in the face with fairy dust and sparkly houses and I was skeptical to begin with, and let my insecurities win over. I’m so sorry, Lele. You don’t know how much.” Jisung croaked, his voice strained and sad as he let everything out in one messy string of hasted speech. Chenle bit his lips as tears fell from the side of his eyes. 

Chenle breathed in and out, wiping his face as he finally lifted his head to look back at Jisung. “W-when you looked at me, that night… when I told you I liked you. You looked so appalled and shocked. It was just like… h-how my dad looked at me when I told him I liked boys. The same slap in the face. I was so scared at that moment. I didn’t want to lose anything, but I didn’t want to lie either. But these things… never worked out for me.. I wanted to believe you’d understand.. and I lost you too. Just like how I lost dad.” Chenle finally spoke, trembling voice and shivering body. Jisung wanted to envelope him, warm up and keep him safe, but kept himself at bay. 

_ Listen to him. You can’t fuck this up this time, listen to him. _

“You never lost me. I didn’t understand, but now I do. And even in the past two years, you still had me won over. You were never out of my brain for a second. Even when I was in relationships, even when I tried to forget. I’m two years too late, but I’m coming here knowing that  _ you are  _ my soulmate, and I won’t doubt it anymore.” Jisung said as sternly as he could in his condition. He stared right into Chenle’s wide eyes, more determined than he ever was.

“I’m not a fairytale anymore, Jisung. I’m just a cashier mooching of his cousin in the middle of Seoul. I don’t…” Chenle started being defensive, and Jisung wouldn’t take that. He didn’t need his wealth or anything that came from the vile man that was his father. He didn’t need the money or the status. All he wanted was his soulmate back.

“And I’m a street rat that lives in a neighbourhood full of pickpockets, so what? Ever since the first day you met me you treated me kindly when everyone else told me I’m trash. You didn’t care that I had to apply to fifteen different scholarships and owned maybe five constant outfits I wear all the time because I can’t afford more. I’m okay with living the way I am and I loved you for accepting me as me.” Jisung said adamantly, finally finding it in himself to hold the other’s hand.

Chenle looked at their intertwined fingers and then returned his gave to Jisung’s face. Jisung suddenly felt a rush of memories, from that night at the gardens, before everything went to hell. His first kiss that happened as Chenle found it in himself to hold his hand. 

He came closer, his free hand coming around Chenle’s neck, his thumb drawing lines into his nape tenderly. It felt surreal, being this close to him again after two years of hurt and confusion, but his heart soared as he saw Chenle’s eyes fluttering shut, as if their trust was never up to the test.  _ He believes in this too.  _

Jisung came down to his lips and started out with a soft peck, marvelling over the fact that even at the tiniest touch of their lips he still felt more than he had felt with anyone else. When they finally got more comfortable, he found himself pining Chenle to the corner as they kissed, Chenle’s hand digging into his hair and Jisung holding onto Chenle’s chin, tilting it upwards towards him just so he could fully feel it all again.

_ I missed you. _

Jisung stopped to breathe. His breath was ragged and unsteady but he was happy. He was truly happy, something that was so rare for him in the last years. He looked at Chenle’s face, and emotions overflew him seeing that hesitant, small smile along with those crinkly eyes that were Chenle’s signature look. Already, there was a sliver of the happy, dazzling boy he remembered, and that gave him hope. 

“I love you.” He blurted out. He just wanted to say it - he just wanted Chenle to know. He missed his opportunity to say it two years ago, and if he was already making amends… he guessed it was time to put everything on the table.

Chenle wiped his face again with free hand, laughing to himself quietly. He looked up at Jisung, and squeezed his hand once again, just like he used to do before. “I love you too.” He said, his grip on Jisung’s hand unrelenting, as if he’s scared he’ll disappear again. Jisung pulled him into a hug.

_ I won’t let you go this time. _

It took a while for Jisung to know how he doesn’t need to prepare for every step in the future. It took him even longer to know that being someone soulmate doesn’t mean life full of happiness and sweetness. But now he knew. That being someone’s soulmate doesn’t necessarily mean there wouldn’t be any fights, or hardships. No. A soulmate is someone that no matter what the situation is, no matter how life gets, will be there for you and will come to lift you up. 

A person that will bring out sides from you that you’ve never known of, a person that will always return to you, because that it how much you care. A person that will bring you courage to be yourself, because they love you for yourself.

Jisung looked at Chenle as the boy laid his head on his chest, still trying to calm down. Jisung noticed he still didn’t let his hand go. He smiled.

_ Someone that will always be there to hold my hand, because he wants to. _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> tell me what you think!! last chapter everyone were mad about lele but i think we can all agree lele precious KLJLDJ but!!!! anyway there's a lot here, so if enough people want a bonus... tell me, ill try lol i want to thank anyone who took time to write a comment, or even leave an excited bookmark note, it really warmed my heart. if you wanna talk my twitter handle is @keusookie and my cc is @yanvels. lovely day to all of you~

**Author's Note:**

> hhhhhh i hope you enjoyed! pls let me know if you like it ~  
if you have any question u could either go to my twt @keusookie, or comment ;;


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